Coming Soon

Well it’s been a hard week – I go about my life mostly okay and then remember that I start chemo on Monday.

I hate the unknown; I hate not knowing how I will feel; and most of all I hate that I felt great and now I keep throwing myself into things that make me feel worse.  I know the surgery, chemo, and (now planned) radiation are necessary, but it sucks to feel healthy until the doctors start treating you and make you feel worse.  I’m still looking for the Star-Trek-like medical tricorder or something that could just use a nice painless laser to fix me up.    

So here’s the chemo plan:

Sept 30: AC Chemo

Oct 14: AC Chemo day

Oct 28: AC Chemo day

Nov 11: AC Chemo day

Nov 18: Taxol Chemo, weekly through Feb 10th

The AC is the hard stuff; supposedly the Taxol should be easier.  I’d love visitors though while I’m at the hospital – the AC in particular is kind of an all-day thing.  And I’ve been told I can get a private room and throw a party if I want to, so I just need the incentive of friends being there!

Then when we’re done with that, I take three weeks off and then start 5-day-per-week radiation for six weeks.  We weren’t sure whether I’d need it, but I met with Dr. Pelton, the radiation oncologist, yesterday, and he confirmed it.  He said that because there was such extensive (though non-invasive) cancer, even though the margins were clear they were not very wide (in other words, there wasn’t any cancer on the edges of the areas they removed, but it was pretty close).  That means there’s more of a chance that a little bit was left over somewhere, and so given that it’s an aggressive cancer, and that I’m young, he recommends radiation.  That sucks, partly because radiation is inconvenient since you need to go in every day for your 15-minute “suntan” and makes you tired, but mostly because it makes the reconstructive surgery much more challenging.  Oh well, I’d rather avoid getting cancer again down the line…

I also started physical therapy yesterday, which I’ll be doing for at least the next month and a half.  And I got a long list of things I need to do – forever - to help lower my chances of developing lymphedema, including avoiding sunburn, insect bites, tight sleeves, holding heavy bags, etc on my left arm.  I also can’t immerse my arm in a hot tub for more than a few seconds at a time.  And I am supposed to try to exercise with some special sleeve on. Ugh.  I’m sure I’ll adjust, but for right now it sounds like a major PITA. 

Finally, I have started browsing for wigs.  All the wigs seem to have names, which is entertaining.  So I can be Nora or Ophelia or Hope.  While I am kind of planning to do a different wig each day, I’m going to try to start with one that’s at least kind of close to my actual hair.  I have a friend of a friend who works in theater and has said she can order me wigs wholesale, but the photos on the site she uses are each more horrible than the next so I’m putting it off.  Go take a look though and let me know if you think any look good or, more likely, would be so funny I have to buy them.